"THE PERFECT SHOPKEEPER"

                                               25 OLD BOND STREET,
                                             LONDON, W., 11"th Feb. 1911."

DEAR SIR, --- I have heard from our Lawyers (to whom you compelled us to go to
obtain payment from you) that you have paid "?"6 into court in settlement of our
account of "?"9, 10"s.", of which "?"8, 10"s.", is for repairs to a suit case brought
to us in very bad state, the remaining "?"1 being simply money paid out of
pocket to our workman for watch and coffee-pot repairs, etc.
   In instructing our Lawyers to accept such payment, we think it best to
state that had you at any time told us you objected to any of the charges we
should at once have tried to have met your wishes and pleased you, but you
never have complained, simply ignoring all our applications for payment as on
previous occasions with your accounts.  The write, you may possibly remember,
had an interview with you here in June 1906, when he remonstrated with you
strongly on your very shabby treatment; you there and then, to make up for it
perhaps, gave us an order, selecting the very fine suit case over which your
were, by the special instructions of the writer, put on most liberal terms for
   Perhaps having treated us so shabbily again you will give us another order,
for if letting people in for needless Lawyers' expense is your idea of right
from wrong it is very different from

                                      Yours faithfully,

                                             A. ELLIOTT of

                                                    J. W. BENSON LTD.

   "P.S." --- if calling, kindly ask for the writer, who will be pleased to see
you again.

   E. A. CROSLEY, Esq.,
      124 Victoria Street, S. W.

   [This letter (a masterpiece of autopsychography) should be read in the
light of the article published in No. iv. pp. 311-313.  A.C.]
   [This correspondence must "not" now cease. --- ED.]